First off let me say i sent a hilarious email today, this poor publicist caught me on the wrong day.I felt very disrespected by her emails.
"First off, Go fuck yourself, how’s that for rude? I would rather be lit on fire than to give you a dime. You and the industry can collectively can eat a dick. Here, let’s use this email as a testimonial. “Wendy can’t provide basic information or answer simple questions, how could I not give her my money, she’s so great!” Soo yeah I’m actively rooting against you as a person and as a publicist, I genuinely hope nothing good happens in your life. My music will never stop as long as there is breath in my body, next time you want to insult a person trying to hire you, check yourself"
Today I woke up and thought " I really just don't give a fuck what happens anymore" Which i've said before but today for the first time in my life, I actually meant it. It's been one of the most beautiful things that has ever happened to me. I'm SO tired of emailing emails that don't get returned, trying SO hard to get people to give a fuck about my music, or trying to kiss the asses of people I legitimately hate. I have unfollowed more people on Instagram than ever before recently. I'm just so done with the game of music, fake Instagram posts, changing my art to make it more palatable to people who " just want something fun to listen to". I've grown SO weary of trying to justify my life's work to people who only see value in things that generate income. I have failed and struggle every single day of my life, what could possibly happen to make things worse? I'll never stop making my music the way I want to, I'll continue even if it's out of spite of these elitist shitty music industry people I'm forced to come across. If I have to work some job I hate and be poor forever, then fuck it.
I don't want to be facetious and create some fake life to get you to be interested in me as an artist.Rarely do i ever stop to actually think about the impossibility of what i'm trying to do.Every song i make is in competition with literally MILLIONS of songs. That's like being an invisible needle in a stack of needles inside an even bigger stack of needles. I'm just going to make my music, if it goes somewhere ,dope, if not I'll just keep doing what I love and find a way to survive. I want to be honest, I'm done trying to make it look like I'm doing better than I am. It's like we always have to be doing cool shit and posting stuff to stimulate people's extremely short attention spans, fuck that. I'll never make money off of music and I've accepted that. I'm going to keep growing and keep doing my thing and I hope at least my music will be shown the respect it deserves someday.The bloggers and taste makers want to keep putting out the same things over and over again. They all claim to want to find the next big thing but get scared when they hear something different. I will persist, fuck the music industry and the standard I've been holding myself to.From now on, I am unapologetically a loser, fighter and I'll prob struggle to my last breath, I am Hythum.